Long time ago, a sailor went for a drink in a Bristol Tavern and met up with an old tar with a wooden leg, one arm and a patch over his eye. They had a few tots of rum together and got talking about old times at sea.
'How did you lose your leg?', the sailor asked?'
'Arr, that be at the battle of the Nile when a cannon ball blew it off, but the ship's surgeon soon fixed me up with a peg leg'.
'What about the arm then?', the sailor asked.
'Arr, that be at the battle of Trafalgar and one of them Frenchies cut it off with his cutlass but I threw him overboard and the surgeon soon fixed me up with a hook.'
'And how did you lose your eye?' the sailor asked.
'Arr, that be a seagull doing his business into my eye at Portsmouth'
'That's no reason to lose an eye' the sailor said,
'Arr, but I wiped it clean with my hand, but I hadn't had the hook for too long, you see'